Tuesday 17 May 2011

Dream 10/05/11

I went to have my hair cut by my favourite hairdresser who was young, petite, pretty and blonde. When I got there the tiny salon was filled with a whole Asian family and I thought I would have to wait for ages, but she said she'd serve me first as they were only her (presumably adoptive) family, and she shooed them out of the salon and told them to come back later. Halfway through cutting my hair she started kissing the back of my neck, and I reached up to touch her face, turned round and kissed her tenderly on the lips, whereupon I immediately felt terribly guilty. She told me she was in love with me and how she'd gone out on an enormous bender the night before with a friend who had just split up with her famous fiancé, and because she - the hairdresser - was so lovesick for me, she'd got totally plastered and depressed and had ended up sleeping with some random guy and had got pregnant, but she promised she'd take care of that. I ended up going to dinner at her family's house, where we were sat next to one another and she kept touching me under the table.

Then we went to a house party where I found myself in the kitchen with a whole bunch of rich artists, and felt very uncomfortable. One of them kept fussing over a pot plant, worrying that the hosts would discover he'd killed it. As we were about to leave, I found a laptop on which was playing a movie trailer depicting the precise events she claimed had happened the night before.

She ended up going to America and so I went there on holiday with my dad to see her. We drove down the freeway into the city and visited a colossal Toys R Us where my dad insisted, wholly uncharacteristically, on buying a mountain of toys for the kids back home. Then we met with the hairdresser, who was waiting for us with her luggage on a vacant lot next to a lockup garage. I helped my dad get a massive green truck out of the lockup and when he started it up it lurched and nearly ran over her luggage. We all drove back in the truck to our hotel, and in our suite she and I started watching a three-video box set of a Lifetime Original true-crime drama series about a cop hunting some kid who had murdered his entire family, during which I fell asleep and dreamt that I was a character in the show.

Saturday 14 May 2011

Dream 21/03/10

Everyone from work had gone to a conference in a country house hotel. One day it was raining and one of my colleagues went out for a walk in the woods with the woman I fancied and whom I wanted to see, so I followed. Once through the woods we came to a rundown cottage which had a café upstairs. I went up and my colleagues were there, so I sat down next to the woman I fancied; but so was my Gaelic teacher, who was sharp with me on account of a snide remark I had made about her class on a feedback form, and when I turned back the woman I fancied had got up and gone downstairs. Somebody told me she'd been saying "I want him to kiss me," so I followed her to a downstairs bedroom where she was sitting on the floor. I sat down next to her and we each put a piece of chocolate in the other's mouth before sharing a long and passionate kiss, a trick she had learned in her youth.

Later she had a shower, and allowed me to watch while she was dressing. Whilst doing this, she was telling me something really important, but I couldn't hear her properly. It was either that she was leaving her husband, or that she was pregnant, or both. I knew that if she was pregnant it couldn't be mine because I had never slept with her, but if she was leaving her husband I wanted her to be with me instead, and I got frustrated because she wouldn't repeat what she had said. Soon everyone had gone and we went out into the back garden, which had overgrown vegetable patches and a dilapidated shed. There we were suddenly attacked by a pack of wild dogs and retard children beating us with large sticks. We managed to escape and ran back out the front where a colleague had pulled up in his car. Before she got in and they drove off, I tried to talk to her again but she still wouldn't repeat what she had said.

The next morning I knew she would be at the cottage again for a meeting with the management and I went there early so I could speak to her when she arrived. When she got there I cornered her in the kitchen and tried to get her to tell me again what she had said, and she was just about to when the management arrived and she was called away to a meeting in the café upstairs.